steady passion

The passionate and determined frenzy of last week has gone and I think that is a good thing. I tend to get myself worked up about something and make all these resolutions and decisions - while on the high of that feeling - and then fail to follow through. This week is about cultivating a practice of regular experience of the Word and of prayer. I have been working through a few different readings plans and have been loving it. Where I get into trouble is in prayer. I think I am still somewhat afraid of diving back in as if I had never left. I'm also afraid of not feeling the deep spiritual connection that I crave if I do decide to pray.

I have also been reading Fresh Wind, Fresh Fire by Jim Cymbala. The whole book is about prayer. I resolve to pray every day until I am back from school. How can God sync my heart to his without prayer? How can I know what he has for me in this next phase of my life without praying to him? The answer is - He can't. I have to humble myself in prayer to be able to fully come back to him.

Pray. Every day. And I will start here.

Lord, please humble me. I am trying but I know that true humility and grace come from you. Please bend my will to fit yours and my heart to feel and see and value the things that your heart does. Please allow me to experience the glory of your presence. Fill me up with your Spirit. I am desperate, I am ready, I am yours.

Love,
Meredith